Thursday, April 16, 2015

The Bride, The Miaden and The Girl

The young bride struggles to please. That is all she can hope to do, and she prays to find the strength to fuel this struggle. This part of the deed is not easy, she is never going to get used to this. She thought it would be happiness ever after and beyond once the wedding was over and all her plans went accordingly. Now all her plans went accordingly and the wedding is over but all she could do to latch on to happiness is struggle to please his family. Before now, her happiness dwelt on her ability to shut down the expectations of others including her family who were all against her marrying a boy that is far from where they are used to. If only they knew how far away from what they are used to she has gone. Now she finds herself trying hard to be accepted into a family she barely knows and play into an alien culture. Will they ever allow her to be herself or will they tie her down to their norms and traditions? Will he explain to them that she is different and stand behind her to make sure they accept her or will he demand that she does as they expect and take away her identity? 

The young maiden knows she is wanted but not wanted as badly as she wants to be wanted. She walked this road looking for this thing that is standing in front of her. Now that she has found it in this man, she can't seem to let herself have it, have him. She knows she cannot have him all at once, but she is troubled that she may not have him at all. To her, he is like a pearl that is better stared at from a distance than worn on one's neck for others to see. She saw him beckoning from a distance to her soul, he seemed a bit reluctant though. To her he seems to be covering up his desire although it shows in different ways. He mentioned it once but retreated the second she showed her own reluctance. But she can't fight this desire that is aggressively rising from her insides. It's a good thing that reality helps her keep it in check. She does not know how far the outlook that reality has framed up for her will last because she has leaped away from it a thousand times in a world that is parallel to this one. This world that mirrors visions from our soul's ideals. She might be crazy to think this but that leap has made her wish that both worlds will collide at some point and she won't have to travel between worlds to find a more perfect perfection. 

The little girl giggles recklessly. She has never been told of a world where her giggles could attract evil to her, yet she lives in one. She is shielded by the purity of her father's cruel kindness to her. His softness to her can only be matched by his brutal approach towards anything at all that threatens her. She is his precious gem and he controls who he shares her beauty with. The world is wired to destroy her innocence and steal her giggle away from her, from him in fact. It puts her on a path that makes her the direct target of every attempt at stamping out innocence and replacing it with fear. The sad part is she will struggle to have a mind of her own, one that reacts to the many threats she faces. She would not be accepted traditionally because tradition has been designed to reject her albeit when she is being used by it. She is going to be beautiful but only in the way that she is expected to be. She is going to be happy, but only as happy as the world allows her to be. 

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